https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vw30jdQz62jL90-dir-El96Mr8DO9AeIr97PJIe9jC8/editGot my second draft edited! My process for editing isn't very involved, I tend to write very much like a spelunker exploring a cave and my first drafts are rather meandering as I'm discovering where I want to go with the piece, so editing is simply going back and taking a more direct route.
In the first draft, I think I crammed a lot of ideas in there at once that kind of ended up sticking out all over the place. I waffled back and forth between the author having forgotten things about Jesse but then simultaneously knowing everything about her. There was also the idea that Jesse wasn't the first, or last, character that needed to be killed and so was just a chore to be ticked off in the author's duties. The author was already unsure how the story was supposed to go in their rewrite, or maybe they'd just forgotten their original ideas, I was unclear on that myself, ironically
In that version the author was discovering things as they talked to Jesse and the reason for her turning on them was sudden too.
So I tried to fix some of those things and focus on Jesse's rightful indignation at being sidelined, and also killed. Making it more about the process of the author slipping up and Jesse finding out that they're not infallible and so, true to her hero nature, seeing them as a final boss that she has to take on in order to get the control she wants. I changed the author's intentions to be in the process of revision, thereby representing a bigger threat to Jesse and giving her more reason to be angry, and this hopefully gave it a more streamlined concept and made some things clearer. I guess we'll see if it's improvement or not
Oh, and true to form, Jesse's now queer. Because why not. Honestly, that just slipped in there while I was trying to rework the dialogue but I guess I can't stop myself even unconsciously.
Topic: Putting the Tertiaries to Rest [SECOND DRAFT] (Read 600 times)